THAT BAD GUY!

Soon-to-be 21

2012-01-27T00:08:00.001+08:00

Is it because I'm going 21 that I become so much more complete?

Or is it that I should be more complete because I'm going 21?

CNY2012

2012-01-24T07:46:00.003+08:00

This CNY trip to po po's house is (Y)! Made some new friends (my first air stewardess friend too!), ate lots of good food, collected ang baos, set off a lot of fire works, watched people puke and get drunk over 007, and not forgetting indian poker! What more can I expect? :D

Wisdom tooth extraction on 27th, I shall pray hard that everything will turn out fine!

I kinda miss Zi Wei Wei already. :(

Christmas Eve 2011

2011-12-25T02:15:00.000+08:00

This Christmas Eve, I was doing push up for Brendan Lai for losing to him (x2) in singles.

I thought too much about the match the day before, and therefore couldn't play to my standards. I'll definitely subdue him during Ranking!!!

This Christmas Eve, I played Mahjong with my Father and 2 veterans and I won $150.

With no expectations, sometimes you may just get what you don't expect.

This Christmas Eve, ~~I think~~ I'm sure of what I really want.

If it's meant to be, it would have been.

2011-08-27T07:21:00.000+08:00

Some people were meant to be in our hearts, but not in our lives.

Wondering, and Wandering.

2011-08-14T01:27:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling like a zombie, aimless and clueless, with nothing to look forward to anymore.

I really hope my ankle recovers soon. Badminton fills my life with colours, it always does.

I still feel for you, but...

2011-08-12T03:16:00.002+08:00

I cried myself a river, built a bridge, and got over it.

Collectively,

2011-08-08T00:57:00.001+08:00

To be honest, when I popped the question, I was holding to a glimpse of hope that you will just say that you want me.

You said that that's not what you want, but since that's what I want, you'll let me go. But if it's something of your aim, say, your studies, would you be so indifferent?

From your hug, I could tell you didn't want to let me go.

"Love is like a puzzle. When you're in love, all the pieces fit but when your heart gets broken, it takes a while to get everything back together."

It was just like how I always say things will always work out for us. I guess this, is also something which worked out for us?

"Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else."

Really?

"The amount of time you are together with her is the amount of time you need to forget her."

19 months together, let me start the countdown to the amount of time I'll need to forget you.

"Every time I see him all cool, calm and collected, I lose my breath, my heart starts pounding, and I am painfully aware that I am not over him and he is over me."

It's wrong. And I know it will not happen, because:

The Notebook
"My Dearest Allie. I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you. Noah"

and after all, you did not fight for me, or for us.

All I wanted was, "All I'm asking for is one night together. Just you and me. All alone. And if you can honestly say you don't feel anything for me after that night, I will finally let you go", but you never gave me a chance.

"Sometimes it's better to be alone. No one can hurt you that way."

Sometimes...?

"I'm going to stay with you because you need a friend, but that's all I'm going to be. No more sex, no more hands in places they shouldn't be, no more giving you my heart so you can stamp all over it."

"Sometime you just have to hold your head up high, blink away the tears and say good-bye."

"I know I'm not completely over him. He still crosses my mind several times a day, but with each one of those times, a feeling of contempt also passes through my heart. Maybe if this happens enough, my heart will become completely hardened to him, and I'll get to the point where he doesn't affect me anymore."

Because, perhaps we were like 2 piece of a puzzle which matches each other perfectly, but the fact is that we were from 2 different puzzles boxes. We're incompatible. We're not meant for each other.

"Loving you was easy, losing you was hard.
Loving you is still easy,
but knowing you are no longer mine,
is the hardest of it all."

That's it. I still love you, but things you've done (or, actually, not done) couldn't keep us together.

GOOD NIGHT, WORLD. LET ME SLEEP MY WAY TO NUMBNESS.

It's The End.

2011-08-06T03:47:00.000+08:00

It ended with a last embrace, a last walk.

难道这就是“梦醒时分”？

我一定要做到“如今依然没有你，我还是我自己”。

2011-07-31T18:06:00.001+08:00

I would have never thought that this would be the post worthy of my time.

2011-07-10T13:48:00.002+08:00

The first thing which came to my mind is to kiss you once we meet.

You just had to destroy everything.

It's alright, because if you can never ever put me above yourself, I don't see the point, anymore.

The present, the quotes... they are nothing but joke to you, right?

I'm sick and tired of playing second fiddle to your life.

2011-04-29T23:37:00.002+08:00

something's definitely wrong, but you never bothered to find out why.

2011-04-10T23:52:00.000+08:00

yun sheng says (11:47 PM):
not scared
see you anyhow anyhow

when its anyhow anyhow, i admit. esp when im thinking with my other head. im sorry.

BUT most of the time, im making sense :D

i may have just found the right way to tackle you. the intellectual way.

2011-04-10T20:19:00.000+08:00

is it really that hard to give me a good 10min?

i know what you need, what you want, what you are. is the vice versa true?

1SIR CO 2.4km Challenge

2011-04-09T21:16:00.003+08:00

Can you imagine 56 elite runners racing for 2.4km together at the same time?

It was the 1SIR CO 2.4km Challenge yesterday and I took part, representing my Support Company.

4 Companies were each sending 16 of their best runners - which makes up 56 Elite runners.

To me, it was more for individual honour and glory. I wanted to be recognised. And next to that, my promised day-offs if I go below 9min and if my company wins.

I'm satisfied that I only gotten 2nd place with 8:49.

Well, I had described it as the RACE OF MY LIFE. It was an opportunity for me to show what I am best at, and for me to tell the whole battalion that I am (one of) the best.

I called because I still looked upon you as my motivation.

And I was satisfied even though I've only gotten 8:49, because I know I went all out (despite being hit by cold, running nose and sore throat).

You, and your advice, plus my planning, were what made it a success.

I was so much looking forward to share this joy with you, show you my Silver medal, celebrate it together.

Yet, all you did was to pour another bucket of cold water on me.

2011-04-08T22:11:00.000+08:00

my greatest nightmare... happened again.

2011-04-08T15:54:00.000+08:00

虽然距离产生美，
~~不过零距离更美。~~不过暗藏危机。

Diminished.

2011-03-19T00:50:00.000+08:00

In the past, I would feel that every meet up and anything that we do is a new connection, a new, special connection that I can't describe.

But to you, it actually is just another meet up.

Eventually, it doesn't matter that much anymore. Really.

Because all along, I was nothing special.

Single(?)

2011-03-13T19:27:00.002+08:00

Day 1 without you.

Why did I wake up in tears?
Why did my eyes turn teary at the thought of you?

~~"Is it really official that it's over?"~~

It's over.

2011-03-12T20:19:00.000+08:00

12032011 1950.

That's it.

It's the end.

~~Or is it?~~

You are who you are.

2011-03-05T11:07:00.001+08:00

Don't just initiate. Take the RIGHT initiative.

On the outside, the dying flame only takes a blow to be extinguished.
But hey, it also only takes a blow to be rekindled.

Inside, let me be stupid-ly in love with you.

Ultimately?

2011-02-27T02:12:00.001+08:00

✓ Falling for you. ✓ Losing you. ✓ Crying over you. ❐ Getting over you.

It's all you.

2011-02-11T23:29:00.000+08:00

Don't tell me when we can't meet. Tell me when we can meet.

Know my pain, see my effort, then accept my love ONLY if you're willing to manage this together with me.

MINE

2011-02-06T02:58:00.000+08:00

This proves everything.

Be mine.

WORDS OF WISDOM

2011-02-05T01:19:00.000+08:00

Angie Ang says (1:11 AM):
for me..i rather the guy provides and i work for my personal interest for fun
Angie Ang says (1:13 AM):
i mean i wont want to not work at all
cos i dont want to sound shallow
in events the guy brings the wife out
if she isnot in the society
her views are very micro
and i dont want to be number one is vegetable price
i rather earn more
plus i get educated to have my own grounds
Angie Ang says (1:13 AM):
plus there is no warrenty
Angie Ang says (1:14 AM):
the guy can abandon the wife
no pt being a vase
Angie Ang says (1:14 AM):
i always think substance over form
haha
Angie Ang says (1:14 AM):
i wrote about life
haha
beside
teh day i breath my last
Angie Ang says (1:15 AM):
i want to have a reasonable footprint on earth

This just shows how much, and how long I've missed out on.

And finally...

2011-02-04T03:00:00.000+08:00

You're mine.

I'm so totally into it.

Birthday?

2011-02-03T18:46:00.001+08:00

It's Chinese New Year, so what?

And coincidentally, my birthday falls on the exact same day. So what?

Honestly, just tell me how important I am to you.

Honestly.

Flame... Almost Extinguished.

2010-12-11T01:03:00.004+08:00

People sing praises at my physical/combat fitness, but who actually knows what I'm going through inside? Maybe I'm not that strong, or that tough after all.

Why is it that when I do, sincerely, try to give selflessly, she just doesn't appreciate, or acknowledge it?

I'm so damn jealous, do you know that?

Where is my god-damn 平常心？

好了伤疤忘了痛

2010-10-20T12:04:00.000+08:00

难道你正如宫所说，“好了伤疤忘了痛？”

我一直坚信我是优秀的，你却从不承认我，甚至让我觉得自己可能没那么优秀。

“你是优秀的。”
“优秀也得看是什么人欣赏！”

我再也不觉得自己配不上你。

我不允许你这样对我。

Starting From NOW.

2010-10-18T20:05:00.001+08:00

I swear that today will be the last day I show her all this... nonsense?

维峰，潇洒点！

置之死地而后生……

I Shouldn't Have.

2010-10-11T10:40:00.001+08:00

I knew I shouldn't have forced it.

I spoilt everything. Sigh.

顺其自然

2010-10-04T23:34:00.002+08:00

I had a super bad dream this morning.

Why is it that I can never receive the same amount of attention you give to others?

想说的，要说的，都说完了。

I feel soooo much better.

Although I look forward to the promised change, I'll let nature take its course.

一切顺其自然吧。

I will go 100% to achieve what I want. But if I don't get it, I will not regret because I've tried my best.

Sigh

2010-09-30T07:53:00.002+08:00

In the end, I think I made a wrong decision.

I should have followed my heart. Damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

Stop Twitching!!!

2010-09-27T19:16:00.001+08:00

My left eye kept twitching today.

Don't let it be you, alright?

It's a principle in life I'll follow from now on.

2010-09-25T08:30:00.000+08:00

开心是一天，不开心也是一天。

从现在开始，我的原则是开开心心地过每一天。

你把你的生活，事业，朋友甚至额外活动都计划得非常妥当，却从不把我安排在你生活里。

Am I Happy?

2010-09-25T07:23:00.002+08:00

42/48 for Advanced Trainfire Package (ATP), 2nd highest in the company.

I earned myself a Marksman badge and $200.

I wish you'd share my joy.

This may be the change...

2010-09-22T20:13:00.000+08:00

"Are you happy talking like this?"

Maybe it's the type of approach I should take

2010-09-20T21:41:00.004+08:00

I rushed, I couldn't wait. You called, and I thought you cared. But it was actually because you planned to have dinner with your OG.

I could have stayed in your place and talked to you for more than 2 hours, yet we met and talked barely for 2 minutes because you wanted to have dinner with your OG. So, everything went according to your plan but you are actually sad that I did not reply your SMS.

What an irony.
I've gone to the extent that I treated you as my flesh and soul. But now, I believe that it wasn't worth it.

Why am I actually doing all these?

It has turned so sour that I now keep thinking to myself, if we... no, sorry. If I am not happy being together, why be together? Or rather, why waste so much effort?

You have plans, you have activities following it, just that I'm not included in your planning.
How do you expect a person to smile when, deep down, he feels so neglected and dismissed?

Loke Yun Sheng, do you know how disappointed, and heartbroken I am?

I must do something, or change something, before this relationship ends up the way I've experienced previously.

Bottom line: 你越不在乎，她就越在乎。

Let go a little, maybe things will change.

2010-09-19T23:27:00.002+08:00

Perhaps you never wanted me to be (overly, i hope) concerned.

Sour, Upset

2010-09-17T23:29:00.000+08:00

"How do you feel when you receive and read my email?"

"Happy!"

"Then why won't you give me the chance to be happy?

You're Hot and Cold.

2010-09-16T22:39:00.000+08:00

是我给得太足了吗？所以我根本就不值得你想念？

无心创的事业可算是一帆风顺，没想到自以为坚固稳定的爱情却坎坎坷坷。

暗示行不通就算了，明示也行不通……
那我真是用尽办法了。请你教教我，你到底想怎么样，好吗？

提点之后，你会改善。不到一会儿，你又会变回原来的样子。

我不喜欢这种忽冷忽热的感觉。

Maybe I wouldn't feel so disgusted if I had recognition.

New Company, New Section

2010-09-15T13:32:00.000+08:00

Maybe it's because I'm just not used to the new culture yet.

Tolerance and Patience is the key. I shall stay out of trouble.

LAPTOP LAPTOP!!!

2010-09-13T19:33:00.002+08:00

BLOGGING FROM IN-CAMP FTW!!!

Although this is another means of communication......

Let It Work Out...

2010-09-09T23:09:00.001+08:00

"Your girlfriend don't mind? Seriously don't mind? Nobody jio her in uni?"
"Must watch what you say when you go out with her."
"Don't just because she go out, your mind all think rubbish, that's it."

-A random corporal when I was performing my guard duty.

This is where trust comes in.

I give up.

2010-09-01T19:16:00.000+08:00

I've tried my best and given my all. In the end, it doesn't matter.

BUT why raise my hopes just to dash it after that?

Because of this?

2010-08-29T18:26:00.001+08:00

I think I know why.

Surprisingly, this took such a short while.

You refuse to admit your mistakes though your logic is sometimes so flawed.

It spells S-T-U-B-B-O-R-N.

And you don't know how to give.

Chapter 3

2010-08-29T18:18:00.004+08:00

A new chapter, Chapter 3, has just begun.

It's mutual, it's mutual, I know.

But am I actually forcing myself to believe?

Somehow, there's an idea planted somewhere deep in my head which says that you don't quite care.

It's your actions, and your way of showing you care.

Is it recognition??? That the overlapping of our social circle is too insignificant?

Or things may be as simple as, because, you're too simple.

I should be happy that this chapter has begun. Let's see how things go......

I am at a loss. I need somebody to talk to, badly.

But who? And what about?

<- ->

2010-08-20T20:11:00.002+08:00

I don't like this inevitable diversion.

The Drive is Back!

2010-08-14T02:05:00.000+08:00

Aim for now: To give my all.

Goal!!!

2010-08-10T00:58:00.000+08:00

‎60, 253, 13, 9.5, 8:26, plus that undisputed number 1 chip.

I never thought I would be able to achieve this.

No... NO!

2010-07-24T23:45:00.000+08:00

I just can't shake it off my mind.

Tell me it wouldn't happen... again.

Lower Your Expectations

2010-07-17T23:59:00.001+08:00

Things may be better if I do not expect too much.

Just continue believing.

I trust you.

Disappointed

2010-07-11T22:32:00.003+08:00

So what if I'm disappointed?

So what if I will no longer be able to achieve what I want to at the end of NS?

For the first time in my life, I've tried my very best. The disappointment hurts like... like WTF, I've never felt this disappointed before.

Seems like I will never be the best.

Life goes on.

Boys -> Man

2010-07-04T10:38:00.001+08:00

Continue dreaming, if you think army makes you become a man.

Army doesn't make you a man, become one yourself through army.

2010-06-26T01:15:00.003+08:00

When they asked us to set goals for the start and end of BMT, I set very ambitious goals.

And I'm glad I managed to accomplish them! I GOT THE COMPANY BEST PT! :D

This just means that I have to work even harder to achieve my next goal, which will be during the end of NS.

Without you, it would not have been possible.

I've Achieved.

2010-06-20T08:59:00.002+08:00

I got 25/25 for my final IPPT, with a 2.4km timing of 8:52min.

Perfect gold? I don't think so. It just isn't enough.

Be Humble

2010-06-11T23:30:00.000+08:00

I never knew I was proud, arrogant and selfish.

Thank you for waking me up.

I found my turning point in BMT, have you?

Field Camp!

2010-06-06T14:23:00.000+08:00

Field Camp is painful. My knee hurts.

But my will is stronger!

BMT!

2010-05-21T21:27:00.000+08:00

BMT. It's not what you leave behind, it's what you'll gain in the days ahead.

2010-05-14T17:28:00.002+08:00

Hello everybody, i'm finally out of army!

Diving, NSing.

2010-04-27T00:00:00.002+08:00

The diving trip was AMAZING.

Next up: National Service.

Dive!

2010-04-22T22:06:00.003+08:00

I learnt how to dive today, and it was fun! Time indeed flies when you are having fun, I didn't realise that the lesson took 3 hours.

Anyway, the only downside is that my jaws now feel quite tired from biting the regulator. Though I know I need not bite so forcefully, I'm a noob after all, right?

My only concern for the diving trip over the weekend is, will the seawater get into my mouth? :/

Fishes, turtles, starfishes, corals, sea anemone, jellyfishes... HERE I COME!

Wished you were here.

总结比赛

2010-04-20T01:55:00.001+08:00

全国小学羽毛球团体赛终于圆满落幕！

Junior Team: 3rd
Senior Team: 4th

你们已经很棒了！

其实，在今天的聚会中，我还有话没说完。就让我在这里重新说一遍吧。

“要我总结你们的比赛，太困难了。
我教球的乐趣和热情，你们给我的酸甜苦辣，看着你们每天一点点的进步，看你们打比赛拼搏的时刻……你们叫我从何说起？

其实，小六这批打进前四对我来说有特别的意义。因为，他们从小一开始学球刚好是我最开始教球的时候！因此，他们是我的第一批学生！他们球打得好好，也就代表我教得好！小六的，我希望你们记着，教练喊你，骂你，是希望你好。如果有一天教练再也不喊你骂你，那就是教练放弃你了，你就没希望了。可是，我从不曾停止过喊或骂你们，那就代表我从来都没有放弃过任何人！既然教练都不放弃你，你更加不应该放弃你自己！

小五的，你们一向表现得非常优秀，你们必需再接再厉！虽然我接下来可能不能继续教你们，明年也可能不能为你们在比赛中加油打气，不过，教练这里*用手指指着心脏*希望你们明年拿冠军！

家长们，你们知道我在海星教球最大的收获是什么吗？
我最大的收获就是你们的认可，你们对我的肯定！谢谢你们！

各位，要我离开这支球队，我是千万般的不舍、不愿！不过，我没办法，只有在这里和你们告别了！海星精神永存，我不会忘记你们的！”

我当场是边说话边想到要离别了，说不下去。
不过，怎么连打字也会使我热泪盈眶？

CHANGE THIS BAD HABIT!

2010-04-16T23:29:00.001+08:00

I will not end it this way anymore. NEVER EVER AGAIN.

2010-04-16T15:00:00.000+08:00

hello everybody here i come again wheeeee

输了球，赢了尊敬。

2010-04-16T00:51:00.001+08:00

0-1……
1-1……
1-2……
2-2……
当两队打成2-2的时候……
当第三单输掉第一局的时候……
当他又扳回一局的时候……
当决定性的第三局开打的时候……

今天比赛的起伏真的太大了。宫教练是如此的相信我——这种“虽然他在场，不过却没有亲自指导第三单或其他队员”的信任。
他相信我能够应付这种起伏，这种压力和这种对抗。

我相信，宫教练也有意思趁这次机会锻炼我指导队员比赛的能力。
还有别的教练肯那么相信自己的助手吗？

那我就没什么可言，只有全力以赴。

但是，第三单在我的指导下，输了。

各位老师，家长：
虽然我尽力了，不过球队在宫教练完美的策划下没有赢球，我有责任。
对不起，各位老师。对不起，各位家长。对不起，宫教练。

我相信，这是世界上最难得、最可贵的锻炼机会之一。
“这”，指的是亲自领着你最爱，也是你教的球队上战场“拼命”。
不过，这种机会，假设不够资格，或不够准备，或不够责任感，那它真是被浪费掉了。

不哭，我不哭。我感到无比的光荣！
我不哭，不过心，正在流血。

我们今天虽输了球，却赢得了尊敬！这才是海星羽球球队。

恭喜恭喜！

2010-04-15T00:24:00.001+08:00

比赛虽然打得有点变扭，不过还是要恭喜海星小学的大小两队都进入了四强！

对道南，我们是有机会的！

各位，加油！

2010-04-15T00:24:00.000+08:00

hello everybody hee hee hee

Inter-Primary Nationals!

2010-03-29T00:20:00.001+08:00

I'm excited!!!

National Inter-Primary competition starts today!

After about a month of conditioning and training after the zonal competition, I sensed significant progress, whether physically or mentally.

What's left, is just the determination to win.

For the Junior team, show them what Marists are capable of!

For the Senior team, 你们得把原本就应该属于你们的挣回来！

GO MARISTS GO!

Tired.

2010-03-28T00:25:00.000+08:00

I feel super tired and lazy nowadays.

I am lethargic. My legs feel heavy. My brain can shut down anytime.

But again, IT'S ALL WORTH IT! :D

Tears

2010-03-27T23:59:00.000+08:00

Sorry for making you tear today, although I promised that I will never ever do so.

I think I just suck at interacting with girls, I never fail to make them tear.

MINE!

2010-03-17T23:49:00.001+08:00

You are now totally mine.

成长过程？

2010-02-28T00:21:00.000+08:00

你们一点责任感都没有，让我太失望了。

尤其是你，你！

怎么光长个子，脑袋却永远像个小孩似的？

恭喜！

2010-02-24T23:53:00.000+08:00

好久都没有这种成就感了。

恭喜海星小学两队都打进决赛，并取得一个冠军和一个亚军的好成绩！

真正的比赛才刚刚开始！

让我们在全国赛和个人赛中再接再厉，为海星争得荣耀！

就算是你应得的，也不代表人家会主动给你。冠军是要挣回来的！

彼此之间……

2010-02-18T02:19:00.000+08:00

最痛苦的，并不是分手，而是当你握住她的手，你已找不回从前的那种感觉——那种属于彼此的感觉。

手与手之间像有层膜，即使握住彼此的手，感觉已不存在。

那又何必执着呢？

脑子到底在想什么？

2010-02-14T13:32:00.001+08:00

原来，最不会做人的人是我。

一连串的失误，难怪他会嫉妒、生气。

有谁能教我，这事该怎么弥补？

我的新年，还会快乐吗？

心痛

2010-02-09T23:55:00.001+08:00

海星现在真是年年破纪录——负面的纪录。

结果是北区前四也保不住？

“打到最后，谁都愿意碰海星。”

辛苦一年下来，值得吗？

你们到底知不知道，或有没有问过，是为了什么而辛苦？

从来都不是，也不该是这样的。

错

2010-02-05T02:24:00.000+08:00

这样下去，不可能长久。

走歪了。

重新调整，我要一步一步来。

爱情是……

2010-02-01T23:49:00.000+08:00

爱情是手中的沙，握得愈紧失去的越多。

没有男人会喜欢像藤蔓一样把自己缠绕得透不过气的女人，有“心计”的女人善用欲擒故纵的策略来抓住男人的心。

每个女人都希望自己永远拥有幸福美满的爱情，那么不妨学着用一捧沙的情怀来对待爱情，好好珍惜，好好把握，爱情必定会圆圆满满。

有个朋友即将出嫁了，在一次她请亲人朋友聚会一起去沙滩玩，我听到，她问她的妈妈：“妈，婚后我该怎么去把握好自己的幸福爱情呢？”

她妈温情地笑了笑，然后从地上捧起一捧沙，我们都看到那捧沙在她（妈妈）手里，圆圆满满，没有一点流失，没有一点撒落，接着她的手用力将手握紧，沙子立刻从指缝间泻落下来，待把手张开时，原来那捧沙子已所剩无几，其团团圆圆的形状也早已被压得扁扁的，毫无美感可言。

朋友忘着她妈妈手中的沙子，领悟地点点头，也许朋友的妈妈是要告诉她女儿：爱情无需刻意去把握，越是想抓牢爱情，反而越容易失去自我，失去原则，失去彼此之间应该保持的宽容和谅解，爱情也会因此而变成毫无美感形式。

说到这里想到一个故事：

有一对家境很普通的夫妇，妻子有一位非常富裕有朋友，一天，那位朋友邀请她和她丈夫参加一个晚宴，她很高兴地接受了邀请。

当她为赴宴做准备时，才发觉自己连一件体面的衣服也没有，她当然不想错过这个接近上流社会的机会，于是马上驾车到一家名牌服装专卖店，买了件非常漂亮的晚礼服，这件衣服用了相当于丈夫几个月的薪水数目。

晚宴当夜，她与丈夫驾着一辆老爷车，来到她朋友的豪宅外面，这时，她觉得自己的小汽车很丢脸，于是叫丈夫把车子停放到很远的地方，然后再走路进去赴宴。

她丈夫没说什么，把车子开到了一个阴暗处，然后对她说：“亲爱的，我想还是你独自去吧，我在车里等你好了，你今天穿得这么漂亮动人，而我只有这身旧西装，我怕会惹起别人的笑话，祝你玩得开心点！”

妻子看着丈夫，觉得他确实穿得很XXX，只好下车，提起裙子往前走，可是，走了没几步，她忽然转过来，匆匆跑回车子，对丈夫说：“我也不想去了”。

丈夫很疑惑，没等他开口问，妻子就平静地说：“实在对不起，我一心想接近上流社会，确忘了自己拥有一位这样体贴自己的丈夫，忘了自己拥有一个幸福的家，你一直对这些很平淡，对我也很宽容，而你的平淡和宽容恰恰提醒了我，请你原谅我吧，我不参加这个宴会了，我们一起到外面吹吹风，然后就回家。

这位丈夫的眼里涌出了泪花，被妻子的话深深感动了，夫妻人心中都充满了幸福感，从此以后，生活也更加甜蜜，温磬。

有人说好人要像放风筝一样与恋人相处，一方面给他足够的自由，一方面牵住手中的线，定会把握住属于自己的幸福。

做自己想做的事情、走自己想走的路！

无拘无束，快乐生活每一天！

http://hi.baidu.com/btls23/blog/item/5f479ddffc47ec3f5982dd11.html

抓在手里的一把沙子，抓的越紧，沙子就越少。
以为越想把他留住，他一离去的时候就特别的在意。
自己最在乎最在意的，一直是得不到或是一直在追寻的。得不到的往往认为是最美好的。
有些时候，放松一下，多给点时间，多给点空间，你会得到意想不到的收获。

MAGIC!

2010-01-20T00:29:00.000+08:00

This is how magic feels like.

它是一种
依依不舍，讨厌说再见的感觉，
人走了，心却仿佛留着的感觉，
从宇宙的开至末端瞬间穿梭来回的感觉，
渴望被疼惜，被爱惜的感觉……

时间变得渺小，只要感觉对了，一切都不太重要。

Relationship

2010-01-18T00:32:00.000+08:00

This time, let me wholeheartedly believe in it and trust in you.

No doubts, no queries, no questions.

Just 100% trust, 100% devotion.

It's gone wrong.

2010-01-12T01:26:00.004+08:00

Firstly, congratulations to my brother Shangguan Weiquan, for doing well for his O levels! Yes yes yes you finally beat me in Chinese, well done k?! You proved that you can, too, do it as long as you put your heart into it! :D

Continue to study hard k! And I'm sure you'll be accepted into a local university ~~as well~~! Then we shall, after all these plus NS, 联手助老爸一臂，不对，是两臂之力！我们要一起打拚，一起闯天下！ :D

Okay, MSBT's annual ranking had been over for more than a week now, and I couldn't find a time to post a proper summary, lol.

This year's ranking was, no doubt, less competitive judging from the number of entries. Of course, it was difficult for everyone to come together since everyone has different commitments, and that many were in NS. However, gong and me were actually quite happy with the response from those who could not come. :)

My main opponents were of course, Zhang Yi and Xiang Teng. Especially Zhang Yi, who denied me of a joint 3rd position in the Pilot-Pen U19 Singles 2009. Argh, 2007, I beat Sheng Jie. 2008, I beat Zhang Yi. 2009, I didn't beat any of them! :(

I failed the challenge and lost to both of them, in both singles and doubles. ._. I cleared the rest easily though. Being at my prime helped, but it just wasn't enough. The prime I'm enjoying now makes me not feel like going to NS! :X

However, from the primary school side, it was really a treasure hunt, seeking out jewels which were surrounded by the ordinary stones.

I was especially impressed by Brennan Lee and Terence Khan's performance. They left the deepest impression on me. However, I hope they will continually strive to improve instead of being satisfied with their current achievements/standard.

永远要记得，打得好，是在校内比赛打得好。真正的好是在校内校外都打得好，这才是真正的成功了。
这次的排名赛让我看到了今年比赛的希望。加油，海星羽毛球队！

What the hell.

I hate myself for not being able to speak to you again, properly.

You may scold, you may yell, you may be unreasonable at times, but after all......

Why do I not have the courage to talk to you?????????

Everything that I want to say, everything that I want you to know, everything that you should feel, its all kept within.

I don't recall us being so... distant from each other.

I want to tell you that I've changed, that I've grown mature, that I have another close friend now, and that I don't want you to worry about me any longer, because I've grown up.

Strangely enough, why do I even need to gather courage when I want to tell you these?

UPDATE: OKAY, SCREW OFF. I SHALL NOT EVEN BOTHER YOU AGAIN, SINCE YOU'RE BEING UNREASONABLE AGAIN.

Give me a tour, a tour to your life, a tour that lasts forever.
And will you be my tour guide?

But gong's right, this tour could be expensive, it could mess up my life, I MUST MUST MUST prioritize!

But let me mess it up, because I've only got about 4 months left till everything becomes a routine again!

And to sum everything up, I'm happy with my life now, and am satisfied with what I have. :)

"Yes," She said.

2010-01-01T03:55:00.000+08:00

It's magical... It's fantastic... It's... I just can't find a suitable word to describe the first day of 2010!

特别的日子，特别的人，特别的气氛，特别的你！

不过，得到的越多，就越害怕失去！

No, not Deja Vu.

2009-12-30T23:59:00.004+08:00

Nooooooo, I broke my golden rule today!

Must change, Weifeng, must change! It ain't supposed to be like that!!! Else it gonna fail like how it did last time!

Let time reveal everything.
我得好自为之。

一到十等于我和你——范瑋琪

一段情
两颗心
三个字
“是”我爱你
“无”聊时就
“溜”出去
“期”待每天在一起
“巴”不得粘着你
“就”这样的不分离
十全十美的爱情
从一到十等于我和你

爱情，有十全十美的吗？
无奈的是，喜欢并不代表适合。

=(

2009-12-29T23:26:00.000+08:00

Again, I lost to Zhang Yi.

Damn.

I realised I didn't quite know you yet.

2009-12-25T21:18:00.002+08:00

Evonne was right. Never think that you know/understand a person very well.

Now, I realised how fake and henceforth disgusting you ~~can be~~ ARE.

HUH?

2009-12-23T23:47:00.003+08:00

Dear SHANGGUAN WEIFENG,
Your class timetable for 2010 is out. Please follow the following instructions to access your timetable:

...

Are they so damn sure that I'll retake JC2?

Anyway, for those who care, I actually didn't work for my father after all. And it's probably because of this that he gets so worked up over the most minor thing that I do, lol.

And I applied to teach @ MSHS (Pri)! Wanted to teach at the secondary side, but since the junior team have their competition in the morning, I didn't have a choice. :( I plan to teach till the day before my enlistment!

宫教练:维峰搭上了末班车! (I believe nobody will get this except me. But still, =_=")

Where's my freedom?

经营感情

2009-12-19T00:05:00.002+08:00

Me: *Hugs my mum*
Mum: 整天在家里抱人家老婆做什么？不会自己出去找女朋友来抱啊？

Sometimes, my mother is super interesting. -.-
But she makes sense, doesn't she? LOL!

I always wondered,

If there's a chance that you can be with the person you like, do you want to be with him/her at every opportunity, or do you deliberately create a feeling of "missing him/her"?

到底应该是“恋人们一日不见如隔三秋”，还是“常相见不如常相思，“长相离”只盼“长相守”；“长相思”只为“长相离””？

现在终于明白，太相爱并不表现在常常在一起！太腻在一起，久了，反而成为一种负担，对方稍稍冷了些，就会造成不安。

不过，涴淳曾经给过我另一种想法。

想爱一个人，那要看你愿不愿意承受那种痛苦——那种相思、想念的痛苦。

爱就是一种盼望，
盼望跟她相聚。
问题是，如果从来没有别离，
又怎么盼望盼聚？

她从始至终就明白！
控制好自己的感情、收敛自己的欲望……

她，值得。太值得了。

与其说自己因为世上有很多条件比自己更好的人而不配，为何不争取，不尝试做那个“更好的人”？

GESSIE!

2009-12-12T21:20:00.002+08:00

I just didn't know that I can feel like this, all over again. <3

Bye.

2009-11-24T13:06:00.003+08:00

This is going to be a awfully long post. I am so tempted to swear throughout this post, but I shan't. Bear with me, as I start my last grumble.

While everyone think of ways to celebrate the end of As, I all along knew what I wanted to do.

To summarize, I want to get back into the badminton court to help MSBT. Also, to re-discover myself on the court, after 2 long tiring years.

But today, it seems that there wasn't any room for negotiation. My father wants me to start work immediately.

I didn't have a chance to say no. Okay, maybe I did, but if my slightest resistance triggered your fume, I don't see the need to resist anymore. When your soft approach didn't work, you engaged the hard one. How can I work with you, when you're like an active volcano, all ready to erupt anytime?

And you FFFFFing tell me how diligent Weiquan is by working straight after Os when I slog my guts out on the court the same period 2 years ago. Because you didn't FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFing regard coaching as an occupation. Why???

Did I earn money? Yes.
Was I tired? Yes.
Did I learn new things? Yes.
Will the things I learn help me in the future? Yes.

In fact, my pay and my working hours is more than most people of my age.

You're jealous, I know you are. Of him.

So what, if I am going to be successful in the future by following your lead?
So what, if I have to inherit your business sooner or later?

You claim, that I should start earning money by bearing hardships because you gave me a comfortable life for the past 18 years. But, I still have a lot of things I want to do. I am still young, I want to venture. I want to play. I want to mahjong. I want to hang out with my newly-discovered friends. I want to work as a relief teacher at MSHS. I want to get into trouble.

You're settling me down a little too early, don't you think?

You're taking my freedom away.

All those worries, about managing time between badminton and friends, are simply history.

Badminton, and friends.

They're my sole source of joy, fulfillment, satisfaction, ...

No more. I am going to be deprived of every one of them.

My passion, badminton, I am going to give it up totally.
Yes, totally. I don't know how I am going to do it, but yes, I'm giving it up totally.

And for those of you (in fact, everyone except one) who still don't know why I used "thatbadguy", it's because of my passion for badminton.

No more freedom, no more passion, no more already-small-enough social life.
What's the difference between me and a zombie then, lol.

He's going to literally transform me into Weifeng II.

True friends, stay with me will ya? Even though I may not have time for you guys, you are treasured, and will forever be in my memories. I'll squeeze all the little bit of time I have left with you, I promise.

This better be worth it, because I traded my entire freedom, passion and social life for it.

That's the problem, when it is just impossible to turn to anyone.

Damn.

2009-11-22T22:21:00.001+08:00

我现在才发现，说一套，做一套的人是我。

明明说好应该完完全全相信你，想不到，被人家一挑拨，我又没站得住脚、动摇了。

你说得对，不值得你劳心劳累猜想我脑后筋在想什么。

我不配做你的知音。

那一个星期，是我这两年里最快乐的日子。
虽然短暂，不过它会永远被保留在我的记忆里。

感谢你给我的那一段真诚，发自内心的笑。
谢谢你。

BLANK.

2009-11-20T01:27:00.001+08:00

I'm quite sick and tired of my emo posts already. Anymore of them, and I'll go into depression.

Give me time, whether to recover from or to wallow in regret, before I stand back up.

不想失去独一无二的你，不过选择权不在我这里。

2009-11-18T21:23:00.010+08:00

GOD, I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE.

JUST FREAKING LET ME TURN TIME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

歌词里的一句一语都是我内心的感受，请原谅我。

陈浩民 - 对不起，请原谅我
作词：稻草人　作曲：稻草人　
编曲：吕绍淳
www.51lrc.com ★ 活在当下制作

和你已很久　忘了你在我背后
为了我风雨不改　一路陪我走
从什么时候　忘了你双手温柔
才让你　眼里一片迷濛

喔　对不起请原谅我
所有一切都是我的错
要如何惩罚　随便说
别再流泪　我心如刀割
喔　对不起请原谅我
这一次我真的知道错了
再也不会让你难过　请原谅我

和你已很久　忘了你在我背后
为了我风雨不改　一路陪我走
从什么时候　忘了你双手温柔
才让你　眼里一片迷濛

喔　对不起请原谅我
所有一切都是我的错
要如何惩罚　随便说
别再流泪　我心如刀割
喔　对不起请原谅我
这一次我真的知道错了
再也不会让你难过　请原谅我

请你再给我一次机会
就当给我的最后施舍
我一定会　一定会好好把握

喔　对不起请原谅我
所有一切都是我的错
要如何惩罚　随便说
别再流泪　我心如刀割
喔　对不起请原谅我
这一次我真的知道错了
再也不会让你难过　请原谅我
我会让你幸福快乐　请原谅我

从此，我伤心欲绝，茶饭不思，成天无所事事。
为何？？？？？？？？？？？？？？？？？

Though it's a simple click, or, a simple depression of that button,

我已不敢，不敢主动。
你……更是难了，难了。

I don't want it to end. Not this way.

感情

2009-11-17T23:25:00.001+08:00

那么我们如何保护这脆而又脆的感情呢？
我们必须学会体谅，学会包容，不必斤斤计较他（她）为什么没有顺从你的意愿。每个人都是独立的，必须有自己独立的空间，任何高压手段只会引起对方更强烈的反抗。再说缺点也是可以相互转化的，你眼中的毒药在别人看来却是鲜花，因此一定要珍惜呀！朋友相处贵在真诚，如果太在意就显得生分，不自然。朋友应该互相帮助，但是朋友不是万能的，那种交朋友就为了求人办事，不交也罢。

朋友有时也会面临这种尴尬的境地，谁没有遇到过朋友向你伸出求救之手，你很激动，因为对方在最危难的时候想到了你，你也下意识的以为自己成了对方最亲近的人。你觉得为了朋友的这份信任，就是赴汤蹈火，两肋插刀，也再所不惜。你使出吃奶的力气，你榨干了最后一滴汗水，你疲劳的好像休克一般，关心你的人埋怨你，但是事情办成了，朋友的赞扬使你飘飘欲仙，你仿佛被打了强心针似的精神百倍。不过，人生不如意事常八九，这样的好事如捻大奖一样稀有，在我们费了九牛二虎之力仍然没有把事情办成时，自己良心的谴责，朋友异样的目光，会使你在青天白日里抬起头来。以后见到那位朋友都觉得亏欠着别人什么。由不安生出冷淡，由冷淡生出疏远，渐渐的两人之间就竖起了隔阂的墙。

如果你还记得我对你的承诺，我想告诉你，它现在、以后、直到永远都生效。
我无非是等你打开你的心房罢了。

寂寞

2009-11-17T23:20:00.006+08:00

我苦笑着、后悔着。

感情是有温度的，它可以升至沸腾，它可以降至冰点，然而一旦建立了感情，它将永远在心灵扎下篱笆，只有岁月能够摧毁它，而残骸却始终影印存在。

人的感情和心情密切联系着，当感情突然遭至所谓的“冷遇”，人的心情也会相应做出反映，给出一落千丈的状态，同时还让你吃饭不香，睡没好觉。

一个人感情是平凡的时候，其实也就是最平淡的，恬静的生活可以无虑，但是少了激情，少了幻想，少了思想，少了思考，少了顾虑，少了牵挂，那不是真正的生活，于是人会倾注感情，让感情生出无数的事端来。

感情是微妙的，无法理解。
感情是丰富的，美妙无比。
感情是脆弱的，一触即溃。

我不想承认我们之间的感情是多么的脆弱。

她始终也不肯对我坦白，就如她一样。

Maybe Yukang, Jiahong and Yinglin were right, I should just stop "giving".

Nope, I think I should "give" selectively in the future.

But wasn't I selective enough?

或许“当初”就是个错，或许“深交”也是个错——同样的错，同样的遭遇，同样的面纱，同样的对待，同样的欺骗，同样的结果，还有我最舍不得的，同样的疏远。

这次，不知为什么，就是不想放弃。问题是，你有同感吗？

不过，我始终还是得感谢你给我的那一段真诚，发自内心地笑。

亲情是一个人的寂寞，想得到的东西，其实一样，希望都过得好，但方式总不被理解，于是你一个人。
爱情是两个人的寂寞，放在一起，其实寂寞在滋长，于是有了7年之痒。
友情是一群人的寂寞，喝酒长歌，放荡形骸，其实寂寞一直都在，于是喧闹过后安静，一起垂泪。
那就寂寞吧，没什么了不起。
寂寞让我如此美丽。

你让我感觉，承诺不算什么。
的确，太美的承诺，因为太年轻。

天做孽，犹可谅。自做孽，不可活！

It's a Yes, but a No.

一言难尽

2009-11-17T00:41:00.000+08:00

我不要在一气之下失去我最关心，最疼惜的人。

想起来，我是有点幼稚。

补救这段辛苦建立起来的感情，是首当的要紧事，

Hong Kong Super Series 2009 & Driving a Lorry

2009-11-15T19:01:00.012+08:00

I feel super miserable now. Not only because of taking time off studying to watch the Finals of the YONEX SUNRISE HONG KONG OPEN SUPER SERIES 2009 from 1:30pm to 6:50pm, but also because it is the worst Super Series tournament I've ever watched. If I have to describe all the final matches in one word, it will be DISGUSTING.

每局比赛几乎都一面倒。
挑球失误，杀球也失误。
发球失误，接发球也失误，第三拍没预判。
被动失误，主动也失误，就像小孩子打球——杀球重就得分。
虚声作势的网前放网也能蒙骗对手不只一次，而是好几次！
总而言之，全部五场的单项赛都带着不寻常的高失误率！

I seriously feel sorry for the crowd who bought tickets to watch the finals live. It's not only boring but also anti-climax.

Countless times, I tried to stay awake watching those supposedly world-class players play, hoping for longer and more exciting rallies. But alas, they just kept disappointing me, again and again, by not playing up to even 30% of their usual standard, if I must say.

If I didn't know the tournament name and the players, I would have thought that I was watching some recreational badminton competition! -__________-"

The only delight I got from watching this competition is killing a mosquito! :D Watching it still twitching after crushing it is damn, shiok.

I finally washed my car yesterday for the first time! It was so sparkling clean and comfortable just looking at it......

......before it rained when I took it out for a spin. T_T

And today, I got to drive my father's lorry out for breakfast with my father and brother! Though it seemed bulky, the steering wheel was unusually easy to turn and the brake is far more sensitive than any car I've drove thus far. O_o

I drove without the engine stalling and without any accidents, I think that's good enough for a first-timer LOL! I even parked without much hassle okay, but of course lah, it's nothing but expected from a 8 demerit-pointer LOL! Just give me a week and I'm sure I'll master driving it! :p

And now, I'm off for dinner, driving the lorry again! ^_^ Bye!

难道外观就会决定一切？
Whatever. Play hard to get, and you'll get nothing!

A Levels

2009-11-09T22:43:00.002+08:00

This is it; the start of an exam in which the grades will determine my next phase in life.

No screw-ups, carelessness or errors allowed.

I hope it will be over real soon. T_T

她，他

2009-11-08T21:46:00.010+08:00

难道我真的曾经逼她到墙角使她透不过气吗？

现在，不同的人，不同的感觉，不同的亲近方式，不同的意图，却有着同样的对待，也得到了同样的反应。
值得庆幸的是，她们的态度非常的不同。

现在觉得，越付出以求建立感情，其实就越难走的靠近点儿。
把自己完全奉献出去有错吗？
难道正如涴淳所说，“想要使对方感受到自己的诚意，一个人只需要给予适当的鼓励，而不是相当的鼓励。”？

况且，近日观察得出她跟他比跟我更投缘。即使她不时也会为我们的“感情户口”存款，但我既然“了解投缘”，那就必需打消自己在她社交圈子是在核心里的概念。

凡是顺其自然，不必刻意强求。这反倒能有一番收获！

不过顺其自然对我来说真的好难，好难。尤其是对于感情这一方面，我觉得彼此都得先交出真心，然后是双方细心的经营，双方面的付出。

既然这次我并不要求对方的付出，那其实我在争辩什么？

世上真的还有很多东西等待着我去学，去体验。

“……原来我只是你的爱情傀儡,原来我只是你的踏脚石,没想到对你付出的一切只换回一些对自己苦苦的嘲笑,苦苦挣扎却无法逃离你带来的伤，付出千般爱在你手中，谁料却是痴情枉送，，在多少个午夜梦回的夜里，泪水在枕边伴随入梦，梦里梦外心都是那么痛……”

-http://www.sanwen8.com/Article/shanggansanwen/200904/10865.html

承诺

2009-11-07T00:01:00.000+08:00

To myself:
她对我可说是剖心剖腹，我到底在想什么，怎么不相信她?!

或许，我真的该改变自己。何必做个人见人厌的混球呢?
对不起！

我不能够再讨厌结交朋友。交朋友，就交呗。
我一定要学会多看别人的优点。

To YOU:
那天，你向我诉苦说你自尊心一直都是在“损伤”的状态中。其实，我一直都没弄明白什么是“自尊心”。

现在，我懂了。
"It's how much you value yourself and how important you think you are. It's how you see yourself and how you feel about your achievements."

虽然多多少少会受到环境（如：家庭）影响，不过，我很想让你知道你其实是有多么的很了不起；只不过我没机会，也没勇气罢了。

你知道吗，你在很多人的心目当中是有个特别的地位的。
你知道吗，你这生的成就虽说不是最成功的，不过也绝对不是虚名的！
你知道吗，你所承受的大概比同年龄的多很多，这使你变得更坚强，更成熟！
说你是人上人，一点也不夸张。

我喜欢，是喜欢你的单纯，你思想的成熟，你的友善，你宽广的心胸……这一切使我想和你好到永远！

请允许我借用《溏心風暴》中，常在心对还可以所许下的一个承诺：

“甲方感激乙方，乙方将来如有任何困难，甲方必定赴汤蹈火，无条件帮忙，此承诺为一生一世，直至任何一方死亡为止。”

即使我不是你倾诉的对象，我也会无条件地以一生守候着你。

现在，我希望你能够暂时隔离自己，摆脱一切的干扰，专心准备即将来临的大考。我相信你能下定决心，排除万难，为目标清楚地向前冲！

因为我相信你能做到。

我们的感情将会是永恒不变的，对吗？

色，就要付出代价！

2009-11-06T23:56:00.000+08:00

An interesting review I saw online on "Jennifer's Body":

太晚了，来不及看，明天还要上班。但看了剧照，女主角是天使的身体，最后变成魔鬼，但愿她来吃我吧。呵呵

不过现实社会中的确有这样的女人，象吸血鬼，还很多。

有些女人，天生丽质，大群的男人围着转，集万千宠爱于一身，万人迷。这些女人要风得风要雨得雨，变得越来越虚荣贪婪。如果你是个男人爱上她，她会榨干你的财富，还要吸干你的时间去陪她，耗干你的精力，她们阅历丰富，一般人很难满足她，还要你浪漫，幽默，热情，风度......最后你被吸干了财富精力，她又去寻找下一个目标了。

你说这样的人象不像吸血鬼？不知道编剧导演是不是象我一样感慨现在的一些女人无底的虚荣贪婪！当然我说的是一部分。

Oh yes, it's already available online! :x
Anyway, I've watch it in the cinema and trust me, it's a good movie for a 2 hour nap inside the air-conditioned theater. :)

色字头上一把刀！